The Mother by Gwendolyn Brooks

Maybe because I'm a woman. Or simply the fact that I'm a human being. With feelings.

But I love this poem. 

Honesty. Sadness. Frustration. Regrets. Love. Helplessness. 

You can just feel them all. 

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Abortions will not let you forget.

You remember the children you got that you did not get,   

The damp small pulps with a little or with no hair,   

The singers and workers that never handled the air.   

You will never neglect or beat

Them, or silence or buy with a sweet.

You will never wind up the sucking-thumb

Or scuttle off ghosts that come.

You will never leave them, controlling your luscious sigh,   

Return for a snack of them, with gobbling mother-eye.

I have heard in the voices of the wind the voices of my dim killed children.

I have contracted. I have eased

My dim dears at the breasts they could never suck.

I have said, Sweets, if I sinned, if I seized

Your luck

And your lives from your unfinished reach,

If I stole your births and your names,

Your straight baby tears and your games,

Your stilted or lovely loves, your tumults, your marriages, aches, and your deaths,

If I poisoned the beginnings of your breaths,

Believe that even in my deliberateness I was not deliberate.   

Though why should I whine,

Whine that the crime was other than mine?—

Since anyhow you are dead.

Or rather, or instead,

You were never made.

But that too, I am afraid,

Is faulty: oh, what shall I say, how is the truth to be said?   

You were born, you had body, you died.

It is just that you never giggled or planned or cried.

Believe me, I loved you all.

Believe me, I knew you, though faintly, and I loved, I loved you

All.

One of the things that

One of the things that

COULD make life miserable is having expectations. Expectations just keep pushing you high up into the air, further away off the ground, floating in a bubble, that you start to lose touch with the reality. They set your guard down that you become neglectful of minding your step. You need to remember that bubbles pop and feet stumble. As much as this sounds so pessimistic, try not to expect so much in people. Because when you hit rock bottom, it hurts so bad.

One of the things that

COULD make life miserable is having a clear view of the past. Walking down through the memory lane is not always a pretty picture. You are tied down to images of regrets and disillusionment that you are forever stuck in your own maze. You just cannot move forward although you try so hard to leave behind the traces of your own doings. The least you could do is put on a smiling facade, concealing the frown inside you because some memories just don’t go away. Some just stay, trailing along your steps, all the time.

One of the things that

COULD make life miserable is the inability to forgive yourself. Being haunted by all the ‘what-if’ questions. Looking in the mirror and seeing a sad reflection looking back at you, in tears, asking you why countless times. Walking around with a heavy baggage on your back that no one could lift it off you. Seeing and hearing anything that reminds you of what you wish you did not do. Knowing the path on which you should tread but you are held back by your own guilt. Seeing some light ahead trying to cast its glow on you but you turn your back on it and remain in the dark. With all the smiles and laughs permeating your life, at the end of the day, you just cannot stop yourself from crying. 

I know this post sounds so gloomy and depressing. But we do have some dark moments lurking inside us and at times they seem so impossible to ignore.

With all the miseries mounting on our shoulder, please remember that we have Him by our side. 

And that is what matters the most.

Stupidity

Stupidity, in my opinion, has nothing to do with one’s innate biological trait. Whatever that comes by nature, that is just an unfortunate illness. Stupidity, I believe, is an act or a mind of personal choice. It is a personal construct. It is when you were aware of your actions/feelings and the outcomes of manifesting them and yet you chose to render them marginal, pretending as if the thought never occurred to you or treating it insignificantly, and eventually at the end of the day, you found yourself feeling tremendously dejected and remorseful about what you had done, remembering all that you had thought of earlier and throwing heavy accusations and unforgiving scathing remarks at yourself. That is the first type. Those who pursue the second type of stupidity are worse, as they are the people who, instead of looking in the mirror and learning and acknowledging their own mistakes, travel the world to find any possible excuses to justify their miseries and put the blame on other people’s shoulders. They manipulate the story of their misfortune and put forward a defensive facade that they will not let any advice, judgement, or criticism penetrate right through them. Simply put, they are just being in denial despite the apparent guilt baggage they carry on their back. Stupidity is when you chose to be ignorant of your own conscience and judgement. When you did what you knew you should have not done.

This is of course my view of stupidity. You will not find this anywhere else because this is just me writing based on what I did, felt, saw, heard or read. In reality, many people were/are stupid. I was, or maybe am one. Now the important question is, when do we start knocking some sense into our own head so that we will stop being stupid?

The Conversation: Seeing God.

Why can’t we see God?

What’s with the question?

Nothing really. It just popped into my head. But have you ever thought about that?

Not really.

Why?

I don’t know. I guess I just don’t question much where the matter of faith is concerned.

So you just believe in it blindly?

No. Just because I don’t question much does not mean I’m a blind follower.

But you’re not doing anything about it.

That is such a heavy accusation. So you’re saying being outspoken about faith is the only means to prove that I’m doing something about and for it? Why can’t we just lay low? I thought we are taught to be moderate and modest.

But we need to speak up. We need to assert our voice.

Moderate is not mediocre. Although mediocre might be listed as one of the synonyms, but mediocre, the word, it just has this some sort of negative vibe around it. Being moderate has nothing to do with our strength. Different people have different ways of showing their devotion. I’m just not one of those loud people. I respect them for having the guts. But whatever they’re doing does not get to trivialise my way of fighting for my belief. So you don’t get to say that I’m not doing anything about it.

Ok, ok. My bad. Let’s just refocus. Why do you think we can’t see God?

That depends. We choose how we want to see things you know.

But God isn’t just a thing.

True. But He could be among those things.

Meaning?

I guess it depends how you define ‘seeing’. It could be seeing things literally. Or metaphorically. Try asking that questions to four or five people and I’m pretty sure you’d get various responses. Interesting ones. Some people would say, they see God. They might mean that literally. Or figuratively. But you cannot say they’re wrong. Because that’s how they define ‘seeing’.

So what would you say about it?

I’d say, I do. That I see God. Metaphorically of course. I guess it’s the best form of existence for us.

Why is that?

Metaphorical view of the existence of God makes me a better believer. I learn how to appreciate little things in life. Abstract or subtle things. I 'see' better. It isn't just about seeing literal things anymore. It's about expanding your view and looking through things instead of looking at them. 
*pause*
I think it’s our nature to analyse anything that is tangible. Question and criticise. If we could see everything in life, we would doubt so many things. We need some vagueness in life. We need some grey area. You could see some white, some black. But you are never too sure. There will always be some room for unanswered questions.

*pause*

Some people are just so analytical, critical, sceptical. Imagine if those people could see God literally? Some of us just like to find faults in others. They live just to bring others down. If God appeared before us physically, our faith could get compromised because like it or not, we’d have our first impression of God, playing at the back of our mind. Having first impression is normal. But what if God was not as what we expected Him to be? Would we stop believing in Him? If everything was so clearly delineated, we would stop learning. We would take things for granted. That is why we need some ambiguity. Some mystery. To evoke curiosity in us. To make us learn. To keep us going. To be alive.

How do you see God?

Through every single thing that I see around me. Every second. Existence isn’t about marking your being. It isn’t about physical existence. For me, it’s about the impact of your being. It’s about your contributions to others. I could feel Him around me through His creations. I could see His significance. That works with humans too you know.

How so?

If somebody asked you about me, what you think of me, how you see me, you would highly likely think about my deeds. You would think about how I make you feel when I’m around you. It’s all about what you feel subsequent to what I do or say. The impact of my being.

It’s interesting how you said you don’t really question about faith that much but you answered my question so beautifully as if you had everything perfectly arranged at the tip of your tongue.

Not questioning is not the equivalent of not thinking. Just because some people are quiet about whatever that is going on in their mind does not mean they are brain dead.

Think!

When you are on the verge of blaming the world for the misfortunes imposed on you, stop. And think. Frustration often brings out the worst of people. You do not want to regret on your careless actions and words after having discovered the repercussions of your being impulsive. Sure you will feel disappointed and down. You will think that you are now at the lowest point of your life. You will feel as if the whole world had turned their back on you. But trust me, putting the blame on other people or even the circumstances won’t make you feel any better. No, Akon, I won't put the blame on you. Because blaming others doesn’t solve your problem. Sometimes, it just aggravates the whole thing further. 

Reflect on what you did in the past. Life is not about moments of distinct and disconnected actions. What you did might have affected your present and future. If you want to see this as a form of punishment, or karma, that is entirely up to you. But seeing everything as a punishment somehow renders life pessimistic isn’t it? And as believers of Islam, we should not feel that way. Besides, who says that our past would always be replete with mistakes and sins? And who says that the present and the future are always inevitably doomed? Whatever the way one perceives this, it teaches us that life is not made up of isolated moments. Every moment is a piece of our life puzzle. The completion of the puzzle relies on the presence of every piece. 

Aristotle in his Poetics talked about how art is an imitation of actions done by men. In explaining about plot, he emphasised the unity thereof. He said that every event in a plot must be connected. Even a surprise will have an air of design. The surprise must be caused by something and cause something. Nothing appears out of the blue. Let me provide you a very basic example; a surprise birthday party. Sure, it is a surprise but prior to the event, there were people planning and preparing the whole thing. So, firstly, the surprise party is not that surprising to those involved in organising the party. Secondly, the party is not without its cause(s) - plan and preparation. Eventually, the party will surprise someone. Hence, thirdly, it also comes with its effect(s) - the person being surprised. See the link tying the actions together? 

Another obvious (but time-consuming) example is the movie 127 Hours. There are many indicators that you can find hinting at the imminent accident such as his ignoring the calls and failure to find his Swiss knife at the beginning of the story. And you will see throughout the movie how the man himself gradually realises what led him to the terrible and painful experience by arranging the images of his past doings together in his mind and recognising his faults. In the end, we can see how he is greatly affected by the incident.

If you start recognising the connection that ties your actions together, it is highly likely that you will stop finding faults in others and start figuring out yours. I am not saying that you should punish yourself for what has happened or is happening to you. Instead, you should contemplate your past deeds. Dig deeper and explore how your own perceptions/actions/decisions determine your course of life, be they good or bad. This will make you a better decision-maker in the future and you will come to realise the control you hold over your own life through your own deeds.

So, whenever you confront a big problem, think of your own actions that might have led you to it. Stop searching the factors in other people or situations. Focus on yourself and your actions. Remember to bear the responsibility alone. Do not let other people take the blame. Yes, sometimes we have the tendency to say, "I didn't want to do this but they made me do it" or "I had to do it because I didn't have any other choices". I do recognise the effects of people's expectations, actions and words on our life and sometimes we just could not help ourselves from not being affected. But all I know is whatever the feeling  you get from blaming other people, say, pleasure, it will not last long. Gradually and eventually, you will start being emotionally (or physically) affected by the problem all over again and the process will be recursive if you keep on seeing other people as the causes of your own problem. You will have some hard time in resolving the problem and reaching some closure if you refuse to acknowledge the role you play in it.

"Start your sentence with “I did/was...”. The intention is not to make you bear the burden of your mistakes and the problem alone. Rather, it will train you to learn the true meaning of responsibility and make you learn out of the experiences. It will definitely hone your critical thinking skills and teach you how to analyse a situation from different vantage points. This whole process of thinking, analysing and learning will slowly make you embrace the reality. And hopefully the problem will not look as bad as it used to be. 

Finally, there is this one famous quote I have always seen quoted by my friends. If anybody knows about this, please do enlighten me on it; “If Allah brings you to it, He will surely bring you through it”. I believe every Muslim should hold to this quote by heart. Remember. Life is not always about being at the top. But you will not remain at the bottom if you continuously strive your way up. God will not help us if we do not help ourselves.

The Veil: Part 1

*The word ‘veil’ here includes both the hijab (the head-cover) and the niqab (the face-cover).

The desire to declare that, associating the act of veiling with any form of enslavement or debasement is merely fulfilling some hidden political scheme outlined by some (recognisable) powers whose sole motive is none other than bringing about the conflicts within the Muslims themselves and eventually their complete control over the Muslim countries, is so great that realising it is just a matter of typing the words in, which I already did anyway albeit generally. Had I not possessed any concrete evidence justifying my claim and considered it as a blindly-constructed accusation, I would instantly disseminate the claim widely without any hesitation. As for now you know that the desire is well established in my mind that getting hold of any proof is highly anticipated. 

I bet most of you by now have watched this video.

If you need to read the transcript of the debate, read it here:
Hebah Ahmed and Mona Eltahawy on the French Niqab Ban


One important thing that needs to be noted is: 

This is a debate between TWO Muslim women.

There are several issues I would like to highlight here.

1. It is sad to learn that the Muslims themselves are ruining the honour of veiling and that of the women donning the veil.
2. Some Muslim women really have the tendency of extrapolating their personal experiences and ethnic cultures to other Muslim women of different backgrounds all over the world. This is a classic case of narrow-minded liberals. Ironic indeed.
3. We are talking about a conflict between the French government and the covered Muslim women. We do not need Mona.
4. Why are they getting so obsessed by a veil, A PIECE OF CLOTH? I mean we have other dire matters that require our immediate attention and yet these people are busy arguing about what the Muslim women should or should not wear. Putting aside the very fact that this is an outright violation of women’s rights let alone those of humans, because they seem to be forgetting about those (the rights) lately, I hope they do realise that the veil that they see as threatening and oppressive is basically JUST a part of what constitutes one’s attire. Of course there are cases where donning a veil is more than just a cloth. But right now, we are dealing with women who are proud of their veil and cover themselves willingly hence all this talk about veiling as one of Islam’s forms of degrading and oppressing the women is completely uncalled for and futile.

I could write about how the non-Muslim women are subject to oppression and denigration through the ways they bring themselves before other people or how they are represented in the media or how they are treated by the men. I could write all these but I feel that it would be pointless. It will not make the Muslim women better by bringing the non-Muslim women down. People are busy defending themselves by being offensive. I certainly do not want to jump on the bandwagon. Hence, I prefer to address this as I feel it should be addressed.

Our life is replete with systems coordinating and regulating our roles and actions. However, it really depends on us whether we want to conform to the systems or not. All the rules and regulations are set before us, we are expected to follow them but at the end of the day we are the one responsible for our own conduct. We act and we bear the consequences of our own actions. As simple as that. Let me provide a few examples: attending classes is compulsory but you still skip one or two; there’s a due date for you to submit your assignment but you often submit later than the appointed time; you need to perform your salat but you disregard them sometimes or most of the time; and you need to be loyal to your partner but you are meeting some other man/woman behind their back.

I’m not encouraging people to skip classes, to procrastinate, to disregard their salat and to cheat on their partner. But the argument I am trying to emphasise here is this; regardless of knowing what we need or obliged to do and recognising the imminent consequences following our actions, sometimes we still do the exact opposite of what was expected of us or in short, we still do the wrong thing in spite of knowing that it’s wrong. Besides this being the obvious indicator that our iman is weakening, another way of viewing it, is that we really have the power to decide what we want to do.

So, most of the Muslims brought up in an Islamic environment are well aware of the dos and don’ts. They know the concepts of rewards and punishments, heaven and hell. But knowing does not mean acknowledging. It certainly does not mean accepting. Many Muslim women sadly, do not cover despite knowing it is obligatory for them to do so. Why? Because they CHOOSE not to cover. There are many factors contributing to their choice but the main point is, they have the power to DECIDE. (Some Muslim women nonetheless, have their personal view on veiling that they do not see it as an obligation. This is of course, a different issue altogether.)

How about the women who are forced to cover by their families and communities? Yes, we do have such circumstances. But do you really think that Muslim women are the only ones who are often shackled to social and cultural practices and expectations? There are numerous stories about women who are of different religious beliefs or ideologies that are forced to succumb to what is strictly imposed on them inconsiderately by their families and societies. Again, I’m just stating the point without giving the examples because the words ‘force’ and ‘Islam’ have been so synonymously associated now as if the definition of the former were the latter that I strongly feel the need to remind people of the matter of force in a broader view. So we are not talking about religion where the matter of force and intolerance is concerned. We are talking about the society, the community and the family. We are talking about the PEOPLE. Islam is not distorted in itself but the people are the ones distorting it for their own benefits and needs. I wish I could say that being a Muslim is the equivalent of being an Islamic devotee because essentially as Muslims, we are supposed to be religious, but I could not because unfortunately the present state highlights a big difference between being a Muslim and being Islamic and the fact that the definitions of 'being a Muslim' and 'being religious' vary according to different people complicates things further.

People need to realise that Muslims come from various ethnographical backgrounds. Thus, no one Muslim is similar to another. The social context affects one’s life. We cannot simply expect one to behave in accordance with how we view them. I am not here to show how divided the Muslims are through the differences that we Muslims exude but being different does not mean disintegration. I love to see how Hebah Ahmed has managed to represent the veiled Muslim women better. But I also feel that the possibility of Islam being misrepresented and misunderstood through this debate. One could listen to this and be amazed by Hebah Ahmed. But this debate could also convince people that the differences among the Muslims are bringing them apart.

If only...

If only I could ignore APA, MLA or whatever format of citation that exists. If only I could do this...

See the Forest not just the Trees

Life is not always about knowing everything independently. Instead, it requires us to recognise the relationships connecting things together. Most of the time, we need to know the larger context. Most of the time, we need to see the bigger picture. We need to see the forest instead of the trees. Because these relationships, this larger context, this bigger picture and this forest, they provide logic and meanings. They render things comprehensible. They make sense. It’s like reading a book. If you are so engrossed in knowing what each word means you are highly likely to lose out not only the messages the author is trying to convey, but also the whole story itself. 

source : sauer-thompson.com

We don’t live alone. We are a part of a family, a community, a society, an organisation, a country or whatever that involves us being connected to people (or animals). What we do could in some way(s) affect other people, emotionally or physically. So think before you do something. You need to predict the potential consequences of your own actions. You need to consider not just your feelings, but those around you, especially the closest ones. Don’t be selfish and say “This is my life and I can do whatever I want with it”. Because you are living with other people. You are connected to them. So if people start criticising you, learn the network to which you are tied. Know your position and the impact thereof upon other people.

Usually (not all the time), we would scowl, curse, and retort whenever people make remarks, harsh at times, about us. Simply put, we start being defensive. We reject the criticisms completely without even trying to consider and reflect about them. And among the common and famous retorts are, “Haters will always hate”, “Haters are our silent admirers”, “Haters want to bring us down because they can’t reach us up high”. (Fine. You don’t really see the last sentence that often. I created it. But you get the drift). But the point is, look how self-absorbed, conceited and narcissistic (basically they mean the same thing. Mwahaha) we have become? We are actually telling the world that we are always right and those who criticise us are just plain wrong and jealous. JEALOUS? To be honest, I think this is the lamest response one could ever give. Because if anybody told me that I’m just jealous of them hence my making remarks about them, I would ask them instantly, “What is SO great about you that could possibly stimulate such a huge emotion in me?”. Don’t get me wrong. That question is not to say that I’m great or whatever. Rather, it is to make some people realise that just because one criticises does not mean one is jealous of them. It is also a question I would often pose to myself whenever I got criticised in the hope that I would be able to see what have I done that could be so inappropriate and could provoke such negative emotions in people. Criticisms remind me not to be proud of myself and make me a better person from time to time. Criticisms make me attentive and sensitive to my surrounding. They make me a better listener. They make me a better thinker.

What I’m trying to do here is to make everyone realise the rather positive side of being criticised. This is not a post to defend the critics. Rather it is to appease the criticised. View criticisms in a different light. People don’t just talk for no reason. There must be at least a reason that makes them talk about you. Find this reason. Contemplate. Ask around. Read. Do whatever it takes to discover why people are talking about you. I know that some comments are not worth to be thought over and worried of. But it does not hurt to listen. If they’re absurd you can just have a good laugh about them. The important point is you have listened to them. Once you are done listening, you are to judge whether they are matters to heed or ignore. It’s just as simple as that. It’s not a battlefield. You do not have to be defensive and most importantly, offensive. Learn to accept criticisms well.

Maybe some will think, why would people want to mind other people’s businesses? If you want to take it as one being nosy then that is entirely your choice. But some people talk because they care. Some maybe did it in a wrong way. Those who criticised you to the extent that you found them cursing you, yes, they are the ones to be ignored. However, I’m talking about those who approached you politely. They could have offended you like how some people did, but they did not. Instead, they revealed their thoughts and feelings to you. They took great care in choosing the words to say so that they would not sound harsh. They are the ones that care about you. So what is so wrong about being taken care of?

Essentially, as a Muslim, we need to take care of each other. We are after all brothers and sisters. So what is this whole thing about minding your own business?

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Language and Identity

No people. This is not a lesson on sociolinguistic. But maybe in some way, it is related to it. Even if it really does, trust me, sociolinguistic is fun. Yes, Nadia and Nashrah. 

There was one young writer who once said that we should write in our own language as to reflect our identity. I disagree. I honestly feel that the language that we write in is of a trivial matter compared to the content of our writing. What we write shows the better side of us. In some ways it reflects our depth of knowledge. Language is just a medium to deliver our thoughts and feelings. Just because one writes in English does not make one less Malay. Writing in English does not have anything to do with turning one’s back on their root.

Some people sadly, have the tendency to condemn the English language just because it is the language of our former coloniser which means the usage of it is equivalent to betraying our own people or the colonialisation of our viewpoint. Maybe there are SOME people who are easily affected by the culture of the language as the case of the latter. But if you are one of those people who support the assumption that EVERYONE will be affected by the language that they use, you are saying that the Arabs are representative of Muslims all over the world because we all know that Qur’an is written in Arabic and we use Arabic daily in, if not conversations, reciting the Qur’an, solat and du’a. And let me clearly stress that how the Arabs think and behave does NOT necessarily portray the Islamic teachings (the need to stress that one out is because apparently some people forget that not all Muslims are Arabs).

So, writing in English does not indicate the westernisation of one’s point of view. My priority has always been my Muslim identity. That and only that. All this talk about being true Malay and fighting for ethnic or cultural identity of which the way I see it is constructed insignificantly and subject to constant changes and improvisation, is meaningless to me. I am not saying that I don’t care about my ethnic culture. It’s just that cultural practices are not stable. They are constantly challenged and changed according to the wants, needs, likes and dislikes of the people. Why should we live our life in accordance with an inconsistent system? How are we to have stability in life if we let our life be ruled over by preferences and bias and be swayed by the ebb and flow of humans’ sentiments? That is the reason why I want to be identified as a Muslim above all. Because Islam gives me stability. Stability makes people feel safe. Safe people are happy people.

*spice*






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The Jekyll in Us

I am sure many have read ‘Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde’. A story that stresses the theme of Good versus Evil. I am not going to discuss the story but what I am highly interested in is the theme. The binary opposition of Good/Evil is represented through ONE man. The manifestation of the conflict within one man allows the idea that every man is of good and evil. As if there were templates labelled ‘Good’ and ‘Evil’ embedded in us and it was natural for human beings to manifest their inner potentials, which can be good or evil or both. It allows and acknowledges the belief that that we all have this bad side lurking behind in the dark waiting to be discovered. This ridiculous notion is a way of saying that it is natural that some people were born to be bad. If we actually live by this system, why must we punish the criminals? Because they can reason that it’s not their fault that their behaviour and desires are of evilness since everyone was born with built-in compartments of Good and Evil and it is highly likely that some will exude a higher inclination towards one over the other, or in this case, evilness over goodness. It is also no surprise then that some treat this as a matter of personal choices and hence revealing their dark nature to the world whenever deemed necessary. The bigger concerns are, if we accept this dualistic nature of human being, we should wonder why God created Heaven and Hell in the first place, why bother with rewards and punishments, and worst of all, why do good deeds when misdeeds are fine and approved of?

No. That is obviously not the case. There are no such templates in us. Evilness is not an inherent trait. It permeates us as soon as our morality starts to tumble down. We are all tested with unnecessary (and evil) urges. Yes, they are urges. Not traits. These urges are not meant to stay with us forever. But they’re not to be realised either. I see these urges as tests imposed by God on us. The most challenging test is our ability to hold ourselves from succumbing to the urges. What do we need then? One word; Faith. Nourish and nurture your faith in God. Build a great big wall of faith so that no evil forces can penetrate their way through it. Darkness comes in the absence of light. Evilness in the absence of faith.

Treating the negative traits as if we were all born naturally with them is just an immoral justification to make us feel good about ourselves and our wrongdoings. It is also our running away from being responsible and taking the blame of our own actions. Maybe some of us do not boldly declare their belief in the inherent evil traits. But it does not require words to see how we have actually been living according to such a distorted way of life. Let me give you an example which I deem might trigger a faintest sense of familiarity in some of us. We have been exposed to the immoral yet sadly, typical lifestyle of enjoying the teenage years with meaningless and frivolous activities, running through the pursuit of material aims and gains during adulthood and remembering God during later years of life, or simply put, during the traces of life left. Classifying our live like that is admitting that it’s fine to be faithless in our younger years because we can always repent later. Sure. That is if you still find yourself breathing after reading this very sentence. Grow up and learn the fact that your wrongdoings are attributed to your slackening in building up your faith and time does not wait on us.

Why do we only have Him wholeheartedly during our final phase of life when He spares us one complete cycle of it?




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